Nov 19

The Great Mystery (Part 1)

Oh how I love mysteries! This one is my favorite of all, since I truly do not understand it completely, though I know someday I will!

A wise woman understands that her husband’s need to be honored is not based on his performance, but on his nature and his God-ordained position. She learns quickly to defer to his ideas or plans with enthusiasm. She looks for ways to reverence him. She knows this is God’s will for her life.

  “This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church….and the wife see that she reverence her husband.” Ephesians 5:32-33

Jesus wants us for a friend. He wants a companion, someone with whom to discuss ideas. He wants a playmate, someone with whom to laugh and enjoy life. He wants a buddy with whom to spend time. He wants a lover, someone to care about and someone to care about him. He wants a help meet, someone to share in his work of creation and management. He wants to be a groom, and he wants the Church to be his bride. This is the great mystery. He seeks to create in me and my relationship to my husband a working scale model of his relationship to the Church throughout eternity. <— Truth! Share it! 

Amazing as it sounds, marriage between a man and a woman is what God chose as the closest example of Christ’s relationship to his bride, the Church. You are part of eternity when you submit to your husband. Submission, reverence, and honor are virtues God seeks to establish in his Son’s bride. Your marriage to your husband is preparing you for your marriage to Christ. You may say, “But it would be easy being married to Christ.” Then you don’t know your Bible. What if your husband required you to off your son upon an altar as a burnt sacrifice? That is what God required of Abraham. What if your husband killed you for lying? That is what God did to Sappihra.

Reverence: to revere, to be in awe; fear mingled with respect and esteem

1. Obedience is doing what you know the other person wants you to do

2. Submission is your heart giving over to the other person’s will

3. Reverence is more than just doing what a man expects or demands. It is an act of the woman’s will to treat him with a high degree of regard and awe.

A wife is reverencing God by reverencing her husband, not because her husband is a fit representative of Christ, and not because he is a worthy substitute, but because God placed her in subjection to her husband.   

If her faithfulness is never rewarded with a new-birth change in her husband, her commitment will not be wasted, for the grace that God is working in her heart is making her supremely fitted to be the bride of Christ.

In what ways do you see your husband recognize your respect? Your reverence?

What are your thoughts on The Great Mystery?


Past Marriage Monday Studies through Debi Pearl’s, “Created to be His Help Meet”


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  1. Laura

    I love that he calls it a great mystery–anticipating how we would wrestle with this and living us through it.

    1. Laura

      LOVING us through it 🙂

      1. simplyhelpinghim


    2. simplyhelpinghim

      Oh yes! That is my favorite part! Mystery! Oh how I love a mystery, especially one I can’t figure out! Absolutely intriguing! 🙂 Blessings to you and yours today girly! 🙂

  2. tinuviel

    Good reminders, especially just before a long weekend of extra time together. Thank you. I’m visiting from the Playdates with God linky list today.

    1. simplyhelpinghim

      Oh yes it is! 🙂 I hadn’t even thought of that when I wrote it! 🙂 Thank you for stoppin by! Blessings!

  3. Karina

    Linking up before you on gracelaced.com. Really love your thoughts on this topic. Super challenging, but I completely agree. It’s difficult to disagree with Scripture. I absolutely loved reading Debi Pearl’s book, I need to read through it again. In church on Sunday, during the singing time the leader was talking about that day when we meet our groom face to face (Christ). This life truly is preparation for an eternal marriage, and I was moved to tears thinking about it. It will be amazing! It is amazing enough when a bride enters the church and the groom sees her dressed in white for the first time. It gives me goosebumps to think that our earthly marriage was meant to be a picture of something so holy. We mess it up so much, so easily. But God gives us grace. And I’m so thankful.

    1. simplyhelpinghim

      So much truth in everything you shared! It is very challenging, I agree! Grace alone is what gets us through this life, through being a picture of Christ and His bride, the Church! Thank you so much for sharing and stoppin by! Blessings!

  4. Michele-Lyn

    You point out some things for me to ponder about. You are right, it is a mystery, a beautiful holy mystery.

    1. simplyhelpinghim

      That it is! Beautiful and holy! 🙂 Thank you for stoppin by! Blessings!

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