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Wisdom To Understand Your Man - Simply Helping Him: Marriage Experience from a Help Meet



Oct 15

Wisdom To Understand Your Man

Men are not all the same. 


By the time a young woman gets married, she has developed a composite image of what her husband ought to be like. The men she has known and the characters in books and movies provide each woman with a concept of the perfect man. Poor guys! 

Our preconceived ideas make it tough on them. They are never perfect ~ far from it. 

Wisdom is knowing what you “bought” when you married that man, and learning to adapt to him as he is, not as you want him to be. <– Truth Tweet ME

There are three characteristic types of men, that Debi covers in her book.

Mr. Command Man, Mr. Visionary and Mr. Steady

Mr. Command ~

Seems sufficient unto himself. They are born with more than their share of dominance. They are born leaders.  

Encouragement for Mrs. Command 

If a wife learns early to enjoy the benefits of taking the second seat, and if she does not take offense to his headstrong aggressiveness, she will be the one sitting at his right side being adored, because this kind of man will totally adore his woman and exalt her. 

When a Command Man (lost or saved) is treated with honor and reverence, a good help meet will find that her man will be wonderfully protective and supportive.

Mr. Visionary ~ 

He is consumed with a need to communicate with his words, music, writing, voice, art or actions. 

Encouragement for Mrs. Visionary

Every Mr. Visionary needs a good, wise, prudent, stable wife who has a positive outlook on life. Learn how to be flexible, and learn how to always be loyal to your man.  He needs your support, and he will appreciate it when it is freely given. Without her, he feels alone. 

The way you think determines how you will feel, and how you feel influences the way you will act.

Mr. Steady ~

He is in the middle, not given to extremes. He does not make snap decisions. He is known for peace and safety to his wife. 

Encouragement for Mrs. Steady 

Your husband’s gentleness is not a weakness, it is his strength. Your husband’s hesitation is not indecision; it is cautious wisdom. Let him be the one God made him to be; a still, quiet, thoughtful presence ~ for you! A steady man likes a woman to walk beside him, yet grow in her own right before God and him.

  The key is to know your man!

How well do you know your man?

Getting to know him and his personality, will make your life easier. You’ll know what he likes, needs and expects of you ~ as his help meet.

More from Debi Pearl’s Book “Created to Be His Help Meet”

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  1. Margaretha

    I just finished Debi’s book for single girls!! The ABSOLUTE BEST book I have read in such a long time. Preparing to be a Helpmeet. IF I had loads of money I would buy a truck load full and hand it out to every girl I know 🙂

    1. simplyhelpinghim

      I have not read Debi’s book for single girls yet, though I do have a copy to read when I get to it 🙂 I love her books, they are full of such wisdom, I’m so glad that you started out with her book before you got married! It will help you succeed tremendously as a Help Meet I’m sure! Thank you for stoppin by! Blessings!

  2. Bonnie

    I enjoyed this. My late husband was a Mr. Steady type and he was indeed very kind and gentle. We were married 12 years before he suddenly got leukemia and died. During those years, I learned how to respect and nurture his steadiness. It paid off for both of us. His stability anchored me, giving me the energy to be a good partner. When he died at 45, he was the wisest man I knew. He was strong in his beliefs, but ever kind, respectful and friendly to everyone. I miss him.

    1. simplyhelpinghim

      What a wonderful blessing! Praying for you this day! Thank you for stoppin by! Blessings!

  3. Laura

    Sounds like some lovely pearls in that book! Thanks for sharing them with us, my friend.

  4. pop champagne

    sounds like a good book… I just have to find a boyfriend first lol!

    1. simplyhelpinghim

      Don’t worry about finding the boyfriend hun 😉 Let God bring him to you! He’s busy writing your love story right now, don’t rush it! 🙂 Blessings!

  5. Kelli

    This is so good. I have never heard of this book, but I am definitely married to a Mr. Steady!

    1. simplyhelpinghim

      The book is one of my favorites 🙂 Thanks for stoppin by! 🙂 Mr. Steady is definitely special 😉 Blessings!

  6. Susie @

    What are great write up today. Thank you for sharing this Misty!

    1. simplyhelpinghim

      Thanks girly! 🙂 Blessings!

  7. Ugochi

    We really need to trust God to know our husbands, and walk with them in that wisdom, Thanks a lot for sharing this with us. Visiting from Matrimonial Monday, do have a super blessed day!

    1. simplyhelpinghim

      That is exactly the truth! 🙂 Thank you for stoppin by! Blessings!

  8. Alicia@The Overflow!

    Ahh.. love these “descriptions” and nuggets of wisdom. I’ve been married to Mr. Steady for 19 years. He’s a true gift! I appreciate his “steady ways” far more now than I did in our newlywed days. Thanks for visiting me at the Overflow today. I’m glad your comment led me here. Blessings as you write and love and serve.

    1. simplyhelpinghim

      That is wonderful! It is so true, that truly taking the time to learn who our spouse is, will allow us to truly appreciate them and their specific qualities! Thank you for stoppin by 😉 Blessings to you as well!

  9. Becky

    great post – so true. Recently, I just went through a whole process of getting to know myself and my husband a lot better. Definitely worth the time as we both bring so much to the marriage! Stopping by from Naptime Review. 🙂

    1. simplyhelpinghim

      Yes, it is a long process, but so very worth it! Thank you for stoppin by! 🙂 Blessings!

  10. Beth

    Thanks for sharing your insights from this book. It sounds like a great one to check out.

    1. simplyhelpinghim

      Absolutely! I definitely recommend it! 🙂 Blessings!

  11. Carol

    I like your descriptions! My husband is definitely Mr. Steady. He is cautious, and I have learned to appreciate that quality. My tendency is to react on impulse– he has shown me the benefit thinking through my responses.

    1. simplyhelpinghim

      They aren’t my descriptions 😉 Mrs. Debi Pearl is the author of the book that I am working through on Marriage Mondays 😉 “Created to be His Help Meet” is the title of the book. Isn’t it amazing how our husbands show us how to do things differently and in turn it makes us better help meets? Blessings!

  12. Rachel @myheartsmission

    My hubby is definitely Mr.Steady. I appreciate his calm presence and wise leadership. Thank you for this thoughtful post about how to support our hubbys and love them the way God made them. Blessings. 🙂

    1. simplyhelpinghim

      Thank you for stoppin by! 🙂 It is so important to remember that God created them the way He did on purpose, just as He did us! Love is unconditional and it goes both ways! Blessings!

  13. Ren

    Great post! My husband is a Mr Command.. (not in a tyrant, jerk sort of way).. A strong leader who absolutely adores ‘his girls” 🙂

    1. simplyhelpinghim

      That’s awesome! 🙂 Mr. Command is a wonderful head of the home! 🙂 Especially when he adores those under his authority! 🙂 Blessings!

  14. Kylie

    Hmm… My husband is all of these guys depending on the day… 🙂

    1. simplyhelpinghim

      I would think that he is probably Mr. Steady then 😉 All men are more dominant as one type, though they can show all of these types as you stated 😉 Blessings!

      1. Kylie

        You’re right about that! Guess I should have known, because that “encouragement” is most encouraging to me. 🙂

        1. simplyhelpinghim

          That would be good evidence 😉 Blessings! 🙂

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