Simply Helping Him ~ What it Means to Me

 

 

 

What does my blog title mean? The words are simple, yet how do they apply to myself, my family and our lives? These are a couple questions I feel are important to answer, so that my readers would know who I am, and where I am coming from.

 

A few years ago, my mother’s best friend sent me a book. (Someone is always sending me a book and I LOVE it!) At that time, my husband and I were struggling, yet again, in our marriage. The book changed my life. It changed my perspective, it changed my attitude. It changed me. The title of the book is “Created to be His Help Meet”, by Debi Pearl. The book is a jewel, and it has a wonderful journal that goes along with it. I have read it at least 3 times, over the last few years and I think I am do another read through.

 

It seems so “old school” to refer to yourself as a “help meet”. I used to think of that term and picture my grandmother back in the 40′s and 50′s. I used to picture a perfectly clean home, dinner always perfect,  perfectly behaved children, etc. Thankfully that is not the description of a “help meet”, it’s a false picture. I used to think that their houses were perfect. Yet dinner wasn’t perfect, and their children weren’t perfect. They just ran their home, took care of their husbands and children, period. The way they were taught, just as we run ours the way we were taught, for the most part.

 

What does the term “help meet” mean? It means that we were created to help our husbands, to meet him where is at. To help whenever and however necessary. The term “help meet”, comes from the book of Genesis.

Genesis 2:18-23

“ And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.

 And out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof.

 And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him.

 And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof;

 And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.

 And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.”

 

This is exactly how we were created, what we were made to be. There is no getting around that, I am here to help my husband, to meet HIS needs. It is not the other way around, he was created first, I was created FOR him!

 

Am I saying that it is always easy to help him all the time, however and whenever he needs it? No, for I am not perfect. Do I always do what I’m supposed to? No, again I am not perfect. Do I strive to do my best? Absolutely. Yet I am still learning, and God is still molding me. I AM a work in progress.

 

The biggest lesson that I learned from the book, was in regards to decisions that my husband made that I struggled with. Submitting. Yes that word. It is a word that torments many of us, especially those of us that are stubborn and strong willed.

 

Noah Webster’s 1828 Dictionary defines it as follows…..

submission

SUBMIS’SION, n. [L. submissio, from submitto.]

 

1. The act of submitting; the act of yielding to power or authority; surrender of the person and power to the control or government of another.

Submission, dauphin! ’tis a mere French word;

We English warriors wot not what it means.

2. Acknowledgment of inferiority or dependence; humble or suppliant behavior.

In all submission and humility,

York doth present himself unto your highness.

3. Acknowledgment of a fault; confession or error.

Be not as extreme in submission, as in offense.

4. Obedience; compliance with the commands or laws of a superior. Submission of children to their parents is an indispensable duty.

5. Resignation; a yielding of one’s will to the will or appointment of a superior without murmuring. Entire and cheerful submission to the will of God is a christian duty of prime excellence.

Definition #2 is where I find myself really connecting to the word “submission”. I was created to be dependent on my husband. He was created to be the leader of the home, to “wear the pants” in the family. He is responsible to the Lord for how he leads, guides and directs our family. I am responsible for submitting to his authority (definition #1), to being dependent on him. Is it always easy? Again, no it isn’t. I am not perfect.

 

Debi Pearl speaks of submission similar to this…. (you really should read this book if you connect with anything I’m saying, it is life changing)

Your husband is responsible to the Lord for his family. For what he does, what he teaches, for the decisions he makes for them, etc. Much like a pastor is responsible to the Lord for the flock in his church.

 

My calling isn’t to try and change his decision, my calling is to submit. Period. If I don’t agree with the decision, that’s ok. I am not accountable for it, my husband is. This truly makes submitting much easier for me.

 

Does this mean I can’t speak to him about the disagreement I have? No, but I (try to) ALWAYS pray about it first. If it is something that I STRONGLY disagree with I will speak to him in private about the topic (again I’m not perfect at that either, there are times I don’t wait to be in private :/) If it is something that doesn’t line up with God’s Word, then I pray immediately that God would be with me as I speak to my husband and discuss it as soon as possible. If it does not go against God’s Word, I strive to always submit.

God calls me to submit to my husband. There’s no way around that.

Ephesians 5:22 

 ”Wives, SUBMIT yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.”

By submitting to my husband, I am in turn submitting to the Lord.

 

My children are always watching, I want my daughter to grow up and know how to submit. If I don’t do it, how can she? If I don’t give the visual picture of submission to my husband, how can she or my son learn to submit to the Lord?

 

This is a small picture of who I am, who I strive to be daily and why I live the way I do.

I highly recommend the book “Created to be His Help Meet”. 

 

If you have any questions, please feel free to contact me @ simplyhelpinghim@gmail.com

 

This “post” is actually a page link listed at the top of my blog, if you wish to find it later :)

 

 

 

 

14 comments

12 pings

Skip to comment form

  1. Sheila at Longings End

    Debi Pearl’s book is an amazing find. I read it about three years ago…and thanks for the reminder. I think it is worth a second read as well…
    Sheila at Longings End recently posted..When a family fractures: 7 helpful suggestions for single moms in forging new traditions… …My Profile

    1. simplyhelpinghim

      :) That it is :) I just sent a copy to my brand new sister in law, as well as the lovely journal that is out now. Blessings!

  2. Sheila V.

    Whoo! Strong words but filled with truth. Thank you for sharing and reminding us what we, wives, are supposed to be and do.

    1. simplyhelpinghim

      The truth isn’t always easy. If it was we wouldn’t struggle with it at times ;) Thank you for stoppin by. Blessings!

  3. Kathleen

    Wonderful Misty — and submitting doesn’t mean we’re a slave or that we submit to things that are against the laws of God — Bless You Sweet Friend! God Bless your New Year :)
    Kathleen recently posted..Love Finds You in Glacier Bay, Alaska and giveawayMy Profile

    1. simplyhelpinghim

      So, so true! Blessings to you dear sis!

  4. Christie

    Hi! I found you through the Monday Mingle! It’s so refreshing to find a fellow believer! I look forward to connecting with you!

    Christie
    http://satisfactionthroughchrist.blogspot.com
    Christie recently posted..Jen Hatmaker’s "7" – Chapter Two – Clothes {Bloom Book Club}My Profile

    1. simplyhelpinghim

      Thanks for stoppin by! I’m so glad you did! Blessings!

  5. Martine

    Inspiring. Thank you for sharing. I find myself on a similar journey. I just felt this nagging, and while I was believing one thing I wasn’t living it.
    Martine recently posted..Dear Corban, Friendship Is About More Than GeographyMy Profile

    1. simplyhelpinghim

      Yes! Walking the walk vs. Talking the talk….I recently posted about that too! Thank you for stoppin by! Blessings!

  6. homemaker-mom.com

    This is amazing you wrote about this I am myself on this journey and not perfect at but it sure encourages me knowing there are other ladies who are trying to be Godly help mets to! Thank you for the encourgement in sharing your story Misty!

    1. simplyhelpinghim

      Thank you for lookin around today friend! It is a journey, never ending I believe! We can always improve! :) Blessings!

  7. Lindsay @ crunchy savings

    Have you read The Power of A Praying Wife? I just started it and found a great online bible study group to go with the book! I also just ordered Created to Be His Help Meet.

    I have to say I find you site and hearing of your journey very inspiring!!

    1. simplyhelpinghim

      I have read that one as well. It is a good book. Great words of wisdom to be found there, praying for our husbands is yet another way to serve and honor them! Thank you for stoppin by and staying a while ;) I hope you’ll return often ;) I’m gonna swing by your neck of the woods as well ;) Blessings!

  1. Simple Frugal Fall Decor

    […] be that I have champagne taste on a water budget. Along with all of my other responsibilities as a help meet, decorating seems to be one that I forget […]

  2. Caring for Your Husband....Your "king" - Simply Helping Him: Marriage Experience from a Help Meet

    […] Simply Helping Him ~ What it Means to Me […]

  3. Announcing: A New Series with Wisdom Wednesday Link Up - Simply Helping Him

    [...] Simply Helping Him ~ What it Means to Me [...]

  4. Is His Heart Safe with You? Part 2 » Simply Helping Him

    [...] Simply Helping Him ~ What it Means to Me [...]

  5. First a Help Meet THEN a Mother with Wisdom Wednesday Link Up | Simply Helping Him

    [...] Simply Helping Him ~ What it Means to Me [...]

  6. A Help Meet’s Imperfection | Simply Helping Him

    [...] Simply Helping Him ~ What it Means to Me [...]

  7. I Used to Need People with Wisdom Wednesday Link Up | Simply Helping Him

    [...] Simply Helping Him ~ What it Means to Me [...]

  8. By Divine Appointment | Simply Helping Him

    [...] Simply Helping Him ~ What it Means to Me [...]

  9. The Nature of Man and Woman | Simply Helping Him

    [...] Simply Helping Him ~ What it Means to Me [...]

  10. Reactions Define You | Simply Helping Him

    [...] Simply Helping Him ~ What it Means to Me [...]

  11. Finding Your Life In His | Simply Helping Him

    [...] Simply Helping Him ~ What it Means to Me [...]

  12. Friend Friday with Simply Better | Simply Helping Him

    [...] Simply Helping Him ~ What it Means to Me [...]

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>

CommentLuv badge