In order to manage a home you must take the time to organize and remain determined. There are many ways to manage and organize, but most mom’s work in similar ways.
As moms we tend to make charts, check boxes, complete to do lists, etc. Babysitters receive lists of dos and don’ts, nursery workers know the cans and can’ts, even the in-laws know the rules of your home.
In our homes, we organize our pantries and fridge a particular way, laundry days are set, menus are created in advance, cleaning days are planned.
We get so used to passing on information to those caring for our kids and/or our homes that we (at times) will even attempt to give a do and don’t reminder list to our husbands.
Somehow we forget that they care for themselves just as we do. The question is how are we more qualified to care for a home or the kids than they are?
Sure things might not be done like we would, but the kids will live after a meal (or two) from Mickey D’s, the dishes can be washed again, and so can the laundry.
Our husbands need to know that we trust them, their God given manly ego requires it. When we try to tell them when to do things, how to do them, when to do them, and how to do it; we completely squash their ego. Chances are that the “alone time” or the help he was offering won’t happen again anytime soon because he sees and senses your distrust in him.
Trust in our husbands must come from remembering God’s design for marriage. He made our husbands the leader of the home. Our life’s calling is to help him as we walk side by side, not to tell him how to do things or when to do them.
My personal experience….
I can’t tell you how many times over the last 10 years that I have left our kiddos home with my husband and as I’ve walked out the door I was rambling off what was in the fridge that they could eat, when they needed their naps, etc. Thankfully he was patient when the kiddos were little because he knew I just wanted to make sure everything went smoothly for him, but over time I could tell that he was getting frustrated and felt like I was “mothering” him.
The only request I make of my husband when I’m away from home visiting my parents, is that he gets all of the dirty dishes into the dishwasher before I arrive home. I can put up with pretty much any other mess, but dirty dishes in my kitchen is not something I can handle.